Interesting day at NDAC today; but we've done it now so I don't need to go there ever again.

Barry and I had planned to gently see how far we could go down bearing in mind it's an 80m deep pit. We'd sourced appropriate mix - Barry was on 16/50 and I was on 14/58 so we were good for slightly deeper than 80. The equivalent air depth was 29m and 22m respectively! Half six set off and lazy drive down got us there at about 9:30 and the place was rammed out as the sea was closed.

The loading pallets were full of dive schools so we went and had some breakfast and waited for them to clear away. We managed to get on a bus at about 11:00 with most of Poland and when we got to the bottoms there were no trolleys. So we manned the rigs down to the deep end and found a collection of trolleys left there by selfish bastards. We grabbed a couple and went back for our bail bottles

On CC you tend not to plan the dive - apart from ensuring appropriate mix; but you do have to plan your bail out plan as that is the factor that limits your dive. Simplistically, we both needed a bottom gas to bail out onto if the breathing loop became compromised, a high O2 / low He mix to flush He (this was Nitrox40), and O2. We decided to run team bail so that between us we would have sufficient gas to bail one of us back to the surface. We both took an 80cf of bottom gas, then Barry had a 7ltr of O2 and I had a 40cf of 40%Nitrox

We'd met loads of old and new friends in the car park and we met Phil down on the pallets as he was running another Explorer course for a bunch of Northerners. Barry and I ran our final checks and I was just about to slip into my harness when we heard a woman's screams coming from one of the ladders. We both dashed over as did everyone else to help. Phil bashed the button - which seemed to be ignored so I raised a shout and started waving my arm like a break-dancing epi. Eventually the gonorrhea test pilot who was supposed to be monitoring the jetty spotted me and drove his boat over as slow as f***. Barry had jumped in and was dekitting this poor screamy lady along with a couple of others. When her kit was off she was carefully pulled from the water as she was in extreme pain. By this time competent help arrived with the stretcher and she was loaded on sucking on Barry's O2.

BANG! WTF! A big gust of wind swirled and Barry's KISS had fallen off the pallets and took a nose dive. Barry quickly picked it up and I rushed over to lay mine down also - as we had been just about to get in before it all kicked off our units were standing upright at the edge of the pallet. Barry disappeared with the stretcher and selfishly I was thinking "that's the dive screwed" as without the O2 bottle we couldn't run our bail plan.

The woman had been climbing the ladder and slipped on a rung and her foot went thru the rung and then her BCD and bottle pulled her sideways so she mashed her knee in some horrific way - lesson: take your fins off before climbing NDAC ladders.

After about half an hour, after the ambiance had taken her away we got the O2 back and she had used 70p worth :-) 10 bar off an 80cf. Barry checked his KISS after the fall and it was totally unaffected! If that had been mine I would have had to ship it back to the manufacturer and it would have cost at least £2k to put right.

Five mins to chillax then kit up and in, strap on the bails then down the line to do a bubble check except something was stabbing me in the back so I had Barry have a look and we had to go back to the ladder so he could loosen my dil as the 1st stage had rotated to dig into me. Onwards and downwards........at 9m I'm thinking I'm a bit heavy and went to blow some wing but the hose popped off - I grabbed the line and blew the suit to stabilise. "Uncle Barry" tut tutted at me and put it back on and we dropped slowly down to 50mtrs following the line most of the way to the boat. Quick OK check at 50 and we swam over the edge down to 60 - the viz was 20 metres easily and really bright - we didn't need our torches but fired them up for signalling. over the ledge at 60 and we swam over bugger all really until we eventually got to the bottom of NDAC and there was bugger all there either - and it was 72mtr not the 85 that others had had as the water level was really low.


Not much to report from then on. 6C at the bottom rising to 13C at the 6mtr, we swam down to the shallow end (boring) to deco and the star of the show was the OSTC2. It managed the deco same as the Shearwater but offered more useful information. Oh, the gas and lime for that dive cost me about £6.

I'm sure Barry will fill any gaps :-)

Charlie.

Early on a Saturday morning Jaymes, Keith, Tony and I met at Tony’s workshop to drive down to Portland together in Tony’s van to dive the M2 submarine.


“HMS M2 was a Royal Navy aircraft-carrying submarine shipwrecked in Lyme Bay, Dorset, Britain, on 26 January 1932. She was one of three M-class boats completed.

M2 left her base at Portland on 26 January 1932, for an exercise in West Bay, Dorset carrying Parnall Peto serial N255. Her last communication was a radio message at 10:11 to her submarine depot ship, Titania to announce that she would dive at 10:30. The captain of a passing merchant ship, the Newcastle coaster Tynesider, mentioned that he had seen a large submarine dive stern first at around 11:15. Unaware of the significance of this, he only reported it in passing once he reached port.[1]

Her entire crew of 60 was killed in the accident.[2] The submarine was found on 3 February, eight days after her loss.[3] Ernest Cox, the salvage expert who had raised the German battleships at Scapa Flow, was hired to salvage the M2. In an operation lasting nearly a year and 1,500 dives, on 8 December 1932, she was lifted to within 20 ft (6.1 m) of the surface before a gale sprang up, sending her down to her final resting place.

The hangar door was found open and the aircraft still in it. The accident was believed to be due to water entering the submarine through the hangar door, which had been opened to launch the aircraft shortly after surfacing. This is a similar reason to the loss of the RO-RO cross channel ferry Herald of Free Enterprise in 1987, which capsized when the sea entered the ship through the large car-deck door which was close to the waterline.

Two explanations have been advanced. The first is that since the crew were always trying to beat their record time for launching the aircraft, they had opened the hangar door on surfacing while the deck was still awash. The other theory is that the flooding of the hangar was due to failure of the stern hydroplanes. High pressure air tanks were used to bring the boat to the surface in an awash condition, but to conserve compressed air compressors were then started to completely clear the ballast tanks of water by blowing air into them. This could take as long as 15 minutes to complete. The normal procedure for launching the aircraft was therefore to hold the boat on the surface using the hydroplanes whilst the hangar door was opened and the aircraft launched. Failure of the rear hydroplanes would have sent the stern down as observed by the merchant officers and water would have eventually entered the hangar.” (Wikipedia).

We arrived in the Portland car park in time for a full English, sort dive gear and prepare to board the hard boat which was to take us to the wreck. As we approached the jetty we found out that we were not on a hard boat but on the RIB. We are all sure Tony knew this but decided we might be deterred diving with twinsets off a RIB. As it turned out we were very fortunate as the hard boat had an engine problem so all the divers on there did not get to dive.



I have never dived on a submarine before. I had been told they are a bit boring and basically just a tube. Well it was a tube but as my first submarine I really enjoyed it. The visibility was good, there was plenty of marine life and the wreck itself was very interesting. I also saw a lobster claw laying in the sand. It was huge and vindicates my narked assertion in Scapa that lobsters grow as big as labradors.

If I’m honest the best bit of the dive was the end when Jaymes and I were back on the RIB. The technique for exiting is to clip a lanyard attached to the RIB to a chest D ring, exit your harness and climb the ladder. Keith and Tony did this and Tony noticed a large McMahon reel and dsmb with crack bottle, marked with SOLAS stickers lazily sinking below the RIB. Keith had a loose D ring on his waist belt and as soon as he released this the reel and dsmb were lost forever. Together with the lost seal clubber Keith has had an expensive diving season.

They moved along the side of the RIB and as Tony climbed the ladder Keith starting yelling. Keith had decided to hang onto a ladder rung which Tony was now standing on. Keith is a lovely guy but if I’m honest I came very close to pissing myself. In fact I could easily have done so as I was linked to my pee valve.

The super fast journey back on the completely flat sea was extremely fun. Tony and I passed the time by inflating our drysuits almost to popping point. One day we will grow up but not any day soon.

Sadly a week later I was diving in Stoney Cove and managed to lose my large McMahon reel, dsmb with crack bottle and SOLAS stickers. I am no longer in a position to make rude and annoying comments to Keith.

Myself and another club member, Keith, booked a British Sub Aqua Club
( http://www.bsac.com/ ) mixed gas course at the National Diving Activity Centre
( www.ndac.co.uk ) in Chepstow. The venue is an old granite quarry. The water level
is approximately 150 feet below the ground level and battered old minibuses are used
to take equipment from the car park down a long ramp to near the waters edge. Then
trolleys are used to take kit to the ends of the floating pontoons from which the diving
takes place.

It is a very picturesque place with long granite slab cliffs and is a real sun trap in the
summer. Adjacent to the car park is a shop, filling station, toilets and changing rooms and
a burger van. In fact burger van really does not do it justice as they serve all sorts of food
but the curry, rice and chips is the main reason I travel here from Northampton. They are
just completing the installation of some chicken coops so that divers have some budget
accommodation when they visit which will keep the cost of trips down.

We stayed at a bed and breakfast called Parkfield7 ( http://www.parkfield7.co.uk )
located in St Arvans a few miles away. The rooms were warm, clean and large. We
received a fantastic welcome and the full Irish breakfast was definitely in my top five
breakfasts of all time. As a connoisseur of the full English/Irish/Scottish I can say I
have sampled quite a few. The pub over the road is less than a McMahon reel away and
does good food. Its busy enough to have a friendly atmosphere but not so busy there
isn’t room to spread yourselves out over a large table with all your dive planning tools
preparing for the next day.

We arrived the Thursday evening. I had been up since 05.45am that morning and had
driven to London and back. Keith drove to Chepstow and did all driving. On arrival we
walked to the pub over the road and I had two pints of lager.

I got to bed about 12.30am and woke up at 7.00am. Had a cooked breakfast, two cups of
tea, two cups of coffee and orange juice. Went to NDAC and met the course instructors,
Phil and Stewart and the other students on the course.

We spent a lot of time outside and I felt cold most of the time. We carried our kit to the
bus and at other end carried it to trolleys and wheeled it down to the pontoon. Due to the
type of course we were doing we carried more kit than I usually would. Also the dive site
meant there was more carrying than I am used to when boat diving. We were encouraged
to help each other to carry equipment and treat this as team diving. Although we did this
there were several occasions when other people were occupied and it was quicker to just
lift equipment oneself.

We did some theory in the canteen on the first day as it was not very busy. This was
warm and comfortable. Then we conducted a 68 minute dive to a maximum depth of
6.3 metres. My drysuit leaked and I felt wet and cold. I cannot say I was colder than I

have been during other dives though. I have a pee valve and was connected to a catheter
but did not need to urinate during the dive. My main concern about the course was
shutdowns. I managed to do these without any problem and my buoyancy was very
good too. I was not in the least concerned about setting off my dsmb as I have done this
numerous times. I was using a different reel and when I released it the line caught and I
was dumping air whilst trying to free the reel. I managed to sort it out but had risen three
metres although we were only in six metres of water.

We carried our kit back up to the bus and back to our cars. We sorted kit and had some
theory lessons. Some of time was spent in the canteen but the rest was outside. I spent
the day drinking tea, coffee, coke and water but still felt dehydrated. We ate food in the
afternoon and finished about 5.30pm then went to the pub to finish the lesson. I had a pint
of lager then back to the B&B, sorted kit then went to the pub and had food and one pint
of lager. I got to bed about 12.30pm. Soon after going to bed I woke with a slight tingling
in the fingers of my right hand. I thought I had been laying on my arm and turned over
and went back to sleep. With hindsight I was possibly aware that these symptoms were
not from laying on my arm but I was very drowsy and fell asleep again within a couple of
minutes. I only remembered this when there were symptoms the next day.

I woke at 4.30am and read the course book. We had another delicious cooked breakfast,
tea, coffee and orange juice. I drank water in the car on way to NDAC but still felt
dehydrated. We sat outside planning the days dive. I felt very cold and drank tea to try to
warm up. We carried equipment to the bus and dive site and conducted a 59 minute dive
to a maximum of 48.8m.

Keith and I had very carefully applied masking tape to our slates so that we could write
the dive plan on top of it. Usually I do this in advance in my garage using scissors or
some shears. I am generally quite anal about it and it has to be perfect. On this occasion
we did it in my B&B bedroom ripping the tape by hand. The jagged edges overlapped.
During the dive I realised to my dismay that although the tape sticks very well to the slate
it does not stick well to itself when wet. I had no plan and saw with some amusement and
alarm, neither did Keith as part of his plan floated off into the distance. Fortunately our
rather better prepared instructor Phil had a slate and a VR3 on each arm. One with his
gas mixes and one with ours. We followed his lead and conducted a virtually identical
profile.

Keith and I did all decompression stops. We had back gas 20/30 breathed from the
surface to the bottom and then back to 24 metres, then breathed 40% Nitrox to 10m then
70% Nitrox. I felt no ill effects on the surface although again my leaking drysuit meant I
was very cold. Again I was connected to my pee valve but did not urinate during the dive.
We returned to the car park and sorted gear. There was more theory which was completed
in the pub. I had one pint of lager then back to the B&B and then to the pub. Again I
had one pint of lager and some food, got to bed about 11.30pm and woke at 6.40am.
Another delicious cooked breakfast, tea, coffee and orange juice. This day I did not feel
dehydrated.

At NDAC we planned the days dive outside again. The night before I had reapplied
the masking tape very carefully. This day I wrote the plan twice just in case as well
as my “just deeper / longer”, “loss of deco’ gas” and “bail out” plans. We dived for
61 minutes to 57.1 metres. The water level was low so when we reached the platform
we were not quite at the 60 metres we had planned for so in fact the dive was slightly
shallower. We stuck to the plan and surfaced after doing all stops. My buddy, two
instructors and one other student did the same profile. Following the dive we sat down
and breathed our 70% Nitrox mix for ten minutes before any other activity.

I had felt nervous before the dive as I was worried about sticking to the plan, doing shut
downs and other skills. The day before had been a bit of a disaster and I knew I would
not pass the course if this dive was not a lot more successful. During this dive I urinated
twice and needed to again as we were transporting kit back up to the bus. I held off the
last time though as I couldn’t bring myself to walk up and down the pontoon with pee
running down the outside of my drysuit leg.

Back to the car park, more theory then an open book exam with some discussion between
students and instructors. During the exam I could feel tingling in the fingers of my right
hand. Then the hand itself became uncomfortable. It was tingling, almost throbbing,
irritating but not quite painful. At the back of my mind I knew it was unlike anything I
had felt from straining a muscle or spraining a joint. I felt I was less experienced than
other divers present, wanted to pass the course and was embarrassed to say I was feeling
anything. If I said anything I thought we would all have to stop the exam and I did not
want to cause a problem for the other divers and instructors on the course. I tried to
persuade myself it would go away.

We finished the course and left to drive home. After about an hour my hand got
increasingly more painful and became uncomfortable and now my right arm was also
hurting, my hand was swollen and I had a red rash on the back of my hand. I was still
reluctant to say anything as I wanted to get home to see my wife and I knew she was
cooking spaghetti bolognaise.

I told my buddy who was driving. He got a 70% Nitrox cylinder out of the back of
the van and I breathed that whilst we continued. I looked up numbers for chambers on
Google with my phone, called a number and spoke to someone who advised going to
nearest A&E and also put Rugby hyperbaric chamber on standby.

We arrived at Worchester Accident and Emergency and after 20 minutes of arriving was
able to lie down, was given O2 and put on a saline solution. After fifteen minutes the
symptoms diminished to just a tingling in the fingers on my right hand.

We left the hospital after about an hour and a half and drove to Rugby. Soon after leaving
the Nitrox ran out and the pain became worse. We arrived at the chamber and after
an examination by the Doctor I went into chamber for treatment. During the 5.5 hour
treatment the pain came and went. At its worst it was excruciating and almost unbearable
with a severely throbbing middle finger on my right hand. The fingers either side of it

were throbbing also and there was severe pain just above my right elbow. This lasted for
15 minutes then dissipated to a dull throbbing and tingling to the middle right finger only.
It kept coming and going, sometimes worse than others.

At 4.30am the treatment finished and I stayed at a nurses’ home about 200m away. I
found it difficult to sleep. The pain would wake me up then subside and I would go to
sleep. I slept on and off between 5am and 8am. I then returned to the chamber at 08.30am
for a further 1.5 hour treatment.

The pain was still there but bearable and the Doctor advised me to take 400mg of
ibuprofen three times a day with food.

My drysuit has never leaked before but must have a small hole as it leaked on every dive.
It was wet when removed and I felt wet and cold in the water. I should have not dived
after the first dive but had paid to do course and paid for B&B and did not want to let my
buddy down. I am not exactly skinny and do not usually feel the cold particularly. I must
be getting soft in my middle age as I felt cold for most of the three days. My suit has now
gone off for repair.

I felt dehydrated on the first two days. I did drink quite a bit of water but as I was so cold
I drunk lots of tea, coffee and coke. I also drank alcohol each evening, but not in large
amounts. I had four units of alcohol each evening maximum.

I was nervous prior to and during last dive. I was worried I would not be able to do
shutdowns and that we would not stick exactly to the plan and would fail the course.
Although nervous I did not consciously feel any narcosis.

When the symptoms were apparent I should have told the instructors immediately.
Several members of our club have done this course and they are all more experienced
than me. I did wonder if I was experienced enough to do this course. I was embarrassed
that I would fail the course and that the instructors and students had done the same profile
and were fine. Although I knew what I was feeling was not a strain or pulled muscle
I tried to persuade myself it would go away. This of course is the classic denial which
often accompanies decompression illness.

I am overweight and felt physically tired from carrying all the kit to and from the dive
site. I need to lose weight and gain fitness. The doctor at the chamber was less concerned
about cold and dehydration. He thought that this usually accompanies longer, deeper
diving and that the other divers I was with were almost certainly cold and dehydrated too.
What he thought was more of a concern was my weight and he informed me that “trunk
fat as good absorber of nitrogen.” A polite way of telling me to eat fewer pies.

I did not get enough sleep. I was excited about the course and the trip. I was also nervous
of failing and worried about my job as well. I went to bed late as I was reading the course
material and woke up early thinking about the course, dives and work.

The dives were planned using V planner and Pro plan. The instructors checked the
profiles and everyone dived the same profiles.

The Doctor at Rugby hyperbaric chamber thought the pain in my hand and arm was
caused by a bubble in my neck causing tissue around it to become inflamed and press on
a nerve which runs from my neck to my fingers. He thought that after a couple of days
the inflammation would subside and the pain would go.

Ten days later I still have pain in my middle finger and tingling in the fingers either side
of it. The sensation on my finger tips feels different. Almost as if I have burnt the tips. At
the chamber doctors advice I visited my GP who prescribed a stronger pain killer. I am
now taking paracetamol, ibuprofen and codeine. I will return to my GP in two weeks if
the pain has not gone away.

The chamber doctor thought that the chances of me having a patent foramen ovule
are unlikely, due to my previous diving experience. It is possible I will never have an
incidence of DCI again and there is no reason to test for it unless I do. He advised me he
will be happy after four weeks for me to dive as usual with no restrictions.

All of us learn about DCI during our first diving course. We are told that denial is a major
factor. I have thought about it and know that if it had been my buddy and he had told me
he had symptoms at any time it would not have been an issue and dealing with the DCI
would have taken precedence over the diving or course.

There were a few factors which may have contributed such as the cold a leaking suit and
dehydration. In the longer term losing weight and increasing my fitness levels will benefit
my diving and general health. What I have learnt the most though is to say something
immediately. Even if I am unsure that the symptoms might be caused by DCI it is
sensible to have a doctor determine this.

I would thoroughly recommend the BSAC mixed gas courses. Phil and Stewart are
incredibly knowledgeable and I learnt a huge amount. Much of what I learnt will be used
on shallower dives using air and Nitrox and there has been plenty of kit fettling since I
got home.

My buddy, Keith, was also great and kept calm and looked after me. He even held off
from smoking in the van whilst I was breathing Nitrox.

Worchester A&E were also very good although it did take a long time for them to process
me. They also would not let us take a bottle of oxygen or lend us a blue flashing light
for our trip to Rugby. Perhaps understandable, although both Keith and I were very
disappointed.

The guys at Rugby chamber were brilliant. They really do know their stuff and couldn’t
have looked after me better.

I did have my wife’s spaghetti bolognaise the next evening when I got home. My wife is
slightly disappointed it is only my finger that has been constantly throbbing ever since.

History in brief

Badged as the Best Wreck Dive in Britain, the P&O liner Salsette lies 44m
deep in Lyme Bay.
The wreck is big at 134m long and relatively deep at 34m to the starboard railing
and 44m to the seabed.
Torpedoed by UB-40 on 20 July, 1917, the Salsette might have been just another
of many wartime shipwrecks off Britain's southern shores, but since it was first
dived in the early 1970s, a plethora of portholes and other non-ferrous fittings
have made the Salsette the Mecca of South Coast wreck-diving.
The Salsette once held the coveted Blue Riband for the fastest crossing of the
Atlantic and is listed as having eight cylinders of quadruple expansion engine,
presumably four cylinders for each shaft, so there is a fair amount of boiler and
engine machinery below decks.



The Dive

Scimitar Diving’s boat Cutlass, skippered by owner ‘Smudge’ was our chosen
operator this time and as always, vessel and crew performed faultlessly. The
thing we like about Smudge and his outfit is that he offers a relaxed approach
when diving on his boats.

We were lucky enough to dive the Salsette on two occasions this session (2010),
firstly in May and then in July. May’s dive was a little disappointing due to the
low vis, conditions. Unfortunately an algae bloom was hanging at about 20m,
vastly reducing the amount of natural light that could penetrate to 40m+. Though
the vis, on the wreck was about 4-6m, it was totally dark, so all we could see
was what our torches lit up. In Keith’s case this wasn’t a lot as his ‘oldy worldy’
candle powered lantern has had its day!

July’s dive saw much improved conditions and without any evidence of an algae
bloom, there was better light penetration – All good.
With all members of our group on twin’s and deco cylinders, we were aiming for
about a 1 hour dive time, giving us a good 30 minutes on the wreck.

With the Salsette being over 130m long, you soon realize that one dive just
wouldn’t be enough to see its entire length. We did however manage to see
a good proportion of the wreck. I would have to say, to see all of this wreck in
detail, the two dives we’ve this done season just weren’t enough.

Once on site, Smudge and his crew drop the shot around the middle of the wreck
and waiting a short time for slack, we kitted up and jump in. Descending down
the line it was obvious that there was far more light and slightly better vis that
our previous visit. I recon vis was about 6-8mtrs this time, making a welcome
change from the usual 1-3mtrs we experience at good old Stoney Cove!!
Keith & I decided to go aft when we got to the wreck. We were soon finning over
some fairly large holes in the main deck but decided not to go in to the wreck on
this dive. Looking inside the rearward holes, I reckon the engines and boilers
would have been in there, judging by what appeared to hand rails and walkways
descending into the dark depths to the hole.

Carrying on aft, we soon came across an area of devastation caused by the
torpedo impact, I presume. At this point we ascended towards the top of the
wreck and followed what looked liked partially intact hand rails. Heading forward
now, we came across a capstan, at which point we must have been near the shot
but carried on forward for a while longer. It was good to see an abundance of
fish life as well as spotting a number of large crabs, I think it made the wreck look
alive.

Having now racked up 35 mins, bottom time it was time to deploy a DSMB and
head for the surface. By the time we’d got to 6m, a total of 28 minutes deco was
showing on my computer. 28 minutes of looking at Keith, well worth the price !
We surfaced after a total dive of 77 minutes. A thoroughly enjoyable dive and
can’t wait to do it again, hopefully with even better vis and even better light.

The cruise back was made all the more enjoyable because the lovely mug of hot
chocolate was accompanied by chocolate biscuits, all courtesy of Scimitar diving.

This Saturday we were supposed to be going to Stoney Cove for a dive but a blizzard the
night before made this seem unlikely. I debated an early start standing in Stoney Cove car
park with Big Chris in a blizzard or a lay in, in a warm bed with my wife. Chris lost.

In the morning, whilst laying in my warm bed I got a text from Barry. He wanted to look
at the Delapre water skiing lake as it was frozen over. The diving gear was in the car so
what harm could there be in going to have a look? Barry came over and a cup of tea and
bacon sandwich later we were in our way.

We got there and the lake was almost completely covered in ice. There was a concrete
ramp leading down to the water with a wooden jetty beside it. Perfect as a kitting
up and entry point. The dog walkers gave us some strange looks but that was hardly
surprising. Two grown men who really should know better going ice diving with the most
rudimentary of risk assessments.

We did consider the risks. I have a number coded key box which I lock outside my car
with my car keys in. I told Barry the number but he forgot it. We also put on an extra
layer under our dry suits as the water looked quite chilly. Risk assessment completed we
put on our kit and entered the water. Barry tied off the reel line to the jetty and off we
went. As we descended the top of my head suddenly felt bloody freezing. There was an
air pocket in the top of my hood. The rest of me was toasty warm although with all the
layers in an already snug dry suit shut downs would have proved to be a bit of a problem.

My wing inflator valve froze in the open position immediately and I disconnected the
hose. Due to my semi mittens and being upright on the surface I was struggling to
reconnect it so Barry helped me out. We descended again and proceeded to fin towards
the island. When we reached a rising land mass we headed left into open water and the
edge of the frozen ice.

We both tried breaking the ice a couple of times but it was impossible. Perhaps if we
were walking along the top of it we might have gone through but from underneath with
no leverage it wasn’t possible. Barry inverted himself a couple of times and kicked the
ice with his feet but that didn’t work.

After ten minutes of finning we headed back. At one point I was convinced that there was
a skull on the bottom. It turned out to be a sunken buoy. If it had been a skull we could
have written into “DIVE” magazine telling them how BSAC had taught us everything we
knew and definitely won letter of the month.

For a local frozen lake this was a lot of fun. The vis’ was amazing. Apart from my cold
head neither of us were at all cold in the 3º water. There wasn’t a lot to see apart from
several Carlsberg cans and a buoy pretending to be a skull but as a one off dive it was a
lot of fun and made a change from Stoney Cove.

Barry may well write a trip report too when he recovers from his hangover from the
Saints Divers Christmas party.

At the beginning of September, member’s of Saint Divers joined by members of Timpkins Diving Club, travelled to the Orkneys to dive Scapa Flow.  The trip had been planned for some time and ended up being a bit like the film “Trains, Planes and Automobiles” with different modes of transport being taken.

Helen managed to get us a great deal on transporting our kit with a courier which enabled many of us to fly. This was a very relaxing way of getting there although some of the smaller planes were very exciting when they were coming in to land.

When we arrived at our hotel it was noticed that tea bags were on a drying rack ready to be re-used. I don’t know if this was the policy of this hotel only or a frugal Scottish custom. Needless to say we opened a new packet. There was some relief not to find toilet paper drying on the washing line.

Our boat, the Jean Elaine, was skippered by Andy and was a traditional fishing boat now used to transport divers to the various wrecks in Scapa Flow. It was well kitted out with plenty of room and Mark, the chef, did a fantastic job of looking after us, preparing delicious food and endless cups of tea. Barry took a particular shine to Mark.

Andy was efficient and accommodating. When we jumped off the side, missed the wreck and had to come back on board he didn’t complain at all about letting us have another go. Nor did he complain when some of our divers decided to board a completely different boat.

My only criticism of the boat is that the bloody thing would never stay still. Fortunately I took Sturgeron every morning but the effect took me back to my misspent teenage years. We did lose a couple of days diving due to strong winds which caused rough seas. Remarkably for Scotland it hardly rained at all. If it had it might have made the place seem desolate and forlorn.

One day we witnessed the above event. A sailing boat had got into trouble and had to be towed back by the life boat. A couple of days later the local newspaper reported that a local sailor had got drunk again and had to be towed back to shore.

The fishing boats went out regardless and as their bows dipped into the waves they disappeared into the spray. It made me glad that my work is very much land based and stringent risk assessments prevent me leaving my office if its doing anything more than spitting. I have a great deal of admiration for the fisherman who go out in all weathers.

For those of you who do not know about Scapa Flow it is where the German navy scuttled their entire fleet. 78 ships in total. The British who were guarding them went off for the day to do some naval exercises. When they returned the ships had sunk. Anyone who has ever seen Whiskey Galore can appreciate how this would have made for a fantastic Ealing Comedy. Maybe one day. Anyway, to say it made us look incompetent is a bit of an understatement.

Fortunately for us it means amazing diving on some huge wrecks in relatively shallow and sheltered waters. That is usually the case. The strong winds led to Stoney Cove on a Saturday morning levels of visibility. Despite that we did plenty of diving. Some more than others. This could be due to the delicious Scapa whisky or perhaps being unfortunate enough to follow the wrong shot line.

Despite drinking more alcohol in a week than I would usually drink in a week and a half I did manage to do all the dives. Never let it be said that I get narked though. Putting a starfish on my head and giggling is the sort of thing I would do whilst snorkelling in shallow water. I can’t think why my buddy gave me a gesticulation usually reserved for other road users.

I would like to give a huge thank you to Julie for organising the hotel and boat for us. Despite my disparaging remarks about the hotel (the tea bags are true though – shame on you!) the hotel was comfortable and provided all the facilities we required. It had a fish and chip shop and a pub opposite which I think is how it achieved two stars.

Thank you too to Helen who put a lot of time and effort into transporting our kit to Scapa Flow and back again. In fact there is a funny story about that. The reason it went on two pallets is because when it was being put on the lorry one of the boxes fell off the top. Helen was in tears and furious with the courier and devastated that despite all her efforts someone might not have been able to dive. Worse still it might have been one of the rebreather boxes. Fortunately it was my box which was on the top and nothing was broken although I think Keith’s cable ties might have been damaged by the shock wave. 

Keith searches for the seal clubber

Thank you to Chris for his excellent presentation prior to the trip. It was very informative and for those of us who had not visited Scapa before gave us an insight into what to expect.

There was a bit of an incident on the way home. Kirkwall airport has a luggage reconciliation room. We surmised that this was for travellers whose luggage had gone missing for a long time to be able to have a reunion in private and hug their suitcase and shed a few tears. After checking in our suitcases we were having breakfast when an announcement requested Mr McTaggart to come to the luggage reconciliation room. Instantly I clenched expecting rubber gloves. When I arrived they asked me to unlock my suitcase. The x-ray display showed a metal object which resembled a gun.

Barry showing off at the prowess of his pee valve and Mick hiding from the Revenue    

If I had been returning from seeing my friend who lives in Amsterdam that would not have surprised me as he is a less than salubrious character. In fact one of our mutual friends spent 24 hours in the custody of Her Majesty’s Customs and Excise after some cat worming tablets were planted in his pocket. On this occasion I was fairly confident that there was not a gun in my suitcase. What they pulled out was Sue’s ankle weights. In fact Sue, I don’t think I’ve told you yet, but I have your ankle weights. Which explains why my case was three kilos heavier on the way back than when I went.

Every year, Saints Divers provide support for the Olney Raft and Duck Race. First of all we have to catch hundreds of yellow ducks as they race under Olney bridge to raise money for Scouts and Cubs. Then we have to watch out for rafters in case they fall into the water along the River Ouse. Barry and I couldn’t resist throwing a few water balloons to help them along! The current is quite strong so snorkelling was good. Greg, Barry and I ended up towing one of the rafts most of the way because they lost their paddles! Unfortunately Keith lost a fin and despite a good effort by everyone to find it, it disappeared among all the reeds. Julie, Ian and Tony did a great bbq afterwards. Thank you!